Franz Kafka's big day out at the Castle
Dear Migration Alliance Members and Colleagues in the Australian Immigration Profession,
I had a fun day yesterday and I thought I would tell you all about it.
Actually, I can’t tell you what I did yesterday. If I do tell you I can face imprisonment for a long period of time.
Anyhow, the day started well enough with a warrant for my arrest and my appearance before a Judge of the Federal Court, but not exercising powers as a Judge of that same court. Confused yet? Read on....
I was then bailed, on my own recognisance, to attend a certain place at a certain time for the purposes of being asked secret questions.
So off I went.
I was shown into a room which looked like a Court but it wasn’t a Court.
I was warned about certain things, took an oath and then I was asked stupid questions by a “Counsel’ assisting Madam X. The role of “Counsel” was to ask me questions and for me to answer on my oath. I wasn’t allowed to refuse to answer questions.
I was warned that I had to be respectful of Counsel but there did not appear to be any legal requirement for me to behave that way as it was not a “Court” exercising judicial powers but looked like a Court and conducted itself like a Court. I was told that I had no choice about the proceedings being videotaped and recorded.
Madam X looked like a Magistrate or a Judge and held an appointment like a Judge but wasn’t a Judge.
Over the course of about 3 hours, I was asked on my oath, to take a ramble through a system which is fully explained on a Government website. Then I was asked to guess, speculate and opine about other matters for which there was no evidence, including what was described as “gossip” as opposed to "intelligence" (an oximoron).
The document (which I am not allowed to describe by its proper name), the terms of which I had refused to comply with and which led to my subsequent arrest was predicated on a false and fraudulent basis which did not relate to me specifically but may have related to a group of people generally (a group I am not allowed to identify).
As it turns out, without exception, the answer to every question could have been found out by any 12 year old by resort to publically available information on the internet.
After a couple of hours the proceedings stopped and I was given a cup of tea (medical strength) in a handsome mug emblazoned with the logo of this secret entity. It set me to wondering, "did the makers of the mugs have to be compelled to keep their involvement secret or is it ok to make a mug with a logo on it"?
When I finished my cup I asked them, “ Is there any chance that I can get one of these as a souvenir from the gift shop on my way out”?
Counsel for Madam X look very irritated.
When the “proceedings” (generic not descriptive) recommenced I was asked more stupid questions and was accused of being “recklessly indifferent’ to conduct which was not a crime but might have been somewhat troublesome to people who do not represent applicants in unspecified legal proceedings (generic not descriptive).
Then the proceeding were concluded but not before I was given some homework.
I don’t think Counsel or Madam X will be on my Christmas card list this year.
So what did you do yesterday?
Two Officers from the Australian Federal Police Waiting for me outside the Federal Court in Sydney yesterday
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